HW 50 - First Third of Care-of-the-Dead Book Post

Quotes:
"Death wasn't something to fear, it was something to aspire to, after the troubling business that came before it, of which there was little need to speak."(26)

"In death you're a cold, physical problem that must be dealt with."(26)

"Bake, shake, be done with it." (32)

"In the office, Richard's quick estimate, not including cemetery expenses, comes to $7,680, which he rounds up to $7,900 to provide wiggle room. Then if the final bill is less than the estimate, they'll feel like they got a deal." (page 39)


"The embalmed corpse is an in-between: both a person and an object to fear." (57)

" He doesn't want to be your friend he wants to be your funeral director something that most corporate funeral directors do not do."


Precise:
So far in "Curtains" by Tom Jokinen , Jokinens has been apprenticing with funeral director Neil Bardal, who could see that the future of his funeral home business didn’t involve nice big, expensive cherry-wood boxes. Bardal is from a long generation of undertakers, and he owns a “full-fig” funeral home as well as a crematorium.Jokinen has had to learn to receive bodies and embalm them. He's observed cremations and processed cremains. He learned from embalming artists who tackled impossible situations and made bodies look presentable for decedents’ loved ones.



Analysis:
This book has been okay for the most part. It's actually been a pretty smooth read. I like how its been able mange a wide variety of fascinating topic about death in just a few chapter's already. Its well written, and makes some good insights. I feel like its one of the many books we've read in the past an outsider's takes on a fascinating dirty job to uncover a dirty truth.Tho compared to the others its oddly more interesting. I like the dark humor,and interesting tidbits. It's kind of like reading a blog or column or extended magazine article.On page 26 when Jokinen says "In death you're a cold, physical problem that must be dealt with."Its funny but true. And this is the feeling Ive had reading his book so far. He gives the sad truth a sense of humor in his style of writing.

HW 49 - Comments on Best of Your Break HW

Comment Left For Arden :

Your Post made me think of A Grateful Dead quote "What a long strange trip it's been."You did areal nice job in this post. You really illuminated each interview . I think you and all of the people you interviewed really had some interesting points. To me personally your interviews with Robert and Hadley stood out. I could really relate to Robert when he said "is dead, it doesn't really matter to me." ,In a lot of ways I really agree with this statement because when I die, I die ,alot after that doesn't matter life goes on. While you were critical of Hadley's optimism, I actually appreciate it. Especially when she was describing the service she wants when she dies and says she wants a service "where they could come and remember me the good and the bad. You know just remember me for me." That's exactly how I would want my service to be. I don't want after my death somehow to become a saint or a devil I just want be "remembered for me" . I know as naive as it sounds but I want people to have a party at my funeral, I want music and I want all the people I use to know from way before. I think that's what Hadley was getting at also that people when it comes to death and funerals tend to be sad. Who wants that ? I know I didn't live my entire life to have people at the very end sad and make more out of me then needed. And yes spreading ashes in certain places is illegal but those are one of those times where I think its all right to break the rules. I know my mom and aunt spread my grandmothers ashes in a garden that she loved in central park now that was differently illegal but its what she wanted. Whose to say every one's final resting place has to be six feet under. You had a great post keep it up cant wait to read more .



Comment Left For Sharif:

You did a nice job in this post Sharif. I liked how you really analyzed your interviews,You did a great job At building a contrast between your mother's /father's point of view and "our view's". You also asked some great questions.

However I disagree somewhat when you say "The only reason we don’t react like that is because we are used to the idea, our understanding is much more broad. We were lucky enough to grow up in a generation where tradition isn't something that is held to as high a standard as the ones before us, which allows us to be able to accept things the my mothers generation and culture really could not, which then begs the question how much does our culture/ generational norms effect our decisions?"

I think that in alot of ways we as a generation have still been made to believe in certain taboos of death. So which your statement is more then valid. I think we are more close minded then we even realize

HW 48 - Family Perspectives on the Care of the Dead (COMMENT ON THIS)

I talked to a older friend of the family, who describes how her mother was devastated by the death of her husband. She said that her mother clung to her husbands corpse as he was dressed for the funeral,showered him with kisses. From that day on she said that her mother became a incurably lonely woman. For a long her mother would cry and talk to him as if he was their. She said that her mother had no sense of a afterlife, she had utterly no hope of ever seeing her beloved husband again. She abandoned all the faith she had after he died.

I talked to older gentlemen in my building who seemed not to want to have anything to d with the topic of death. So it was a short interview but he made some interesting points. He said that he believed that after death all that happens is our atoms return to nature and become part of other forms of life. Therefore there is life after death, it's a continual process.He said that he felt religion while in the old days was used to keep the common people in line. Now it was used to make people feel "superior" over every other form of life on the planet. When I told him that I believe their could be a god, or something bigger he said may your god go with you. I am my own god. He said the only real heaven & hell is what happens in your life, "heaven is looking at a new born baby, while hell is loosing someone you love."

Its interesting how everyone makes these choices , between faith and non faith. From everyone I talk to religious to non religious its like they all have this certainty of something they haven't experienced yet. How do you know what's after death if you haven't died.But somehow they’re all certain that they hold the truth , that they belong to to the right thinking, even though they have no clue.I feel that most, not all of course adopt these views to give answers to all of the uncertainties of life. Also a lot probably have these views based on their family, friends,situations making a lot of their "views" on the matter a matter of chance.

HW 46 - Initial Thoughts on the Care of the Dead

I feel that as a society we have devised ways for dealing with death and the knowledge of our own mortality as to ease are fear of the unknown. We use such things as complex visions of what might follow death like heaven or hell, or occupy are work days with responbilites and none sense so we dont have to think about it.

The truth is where all gonning to die. Its the one gurantee. Some people dont like to hear it so straight but its true. I personally dont worry so much about heaven or hell, or what comes after.How I see it, is best case scenario theirs a life after death worse case sceniro is its nothing where gone in a million different particules,"dust to dust".

Death to me seems alot like birth, we dont have any recolation of what we were if anything before we were born so why should we after we die.I think what is never really touched apon is not the death considered by the norm but the death that occues in many people while their still alive . When I think about death, I think of a Poem called "A Long, Long Sleep, a Famous Sleep" by Emily Dickinson :

A long, long sleep, a famous sleep That makes no show for dawn By strech of limb or stir of lid, -- An independent one. Was ever idleness like this? Within a hut of stone To bask the centuries away Nor once look up for noon?

HW 45

Matt, This letter was moving with its creative and persuasive language. From the beginning of the powerful and relevant Kennedy quote, to the atroctious statistical data and your analysis of it, I found myself convinced that I was reading a speech of a "budding activist", but like american literature, we have beautful writing but the actual action the writing is meant to provide is skewed. A question I have for you is, "if you were to begin this kind of movement, how would you account for the movement of actual action holding true to the beautiful writing provided?" Great Post! Response: First I want thank you for taking the the time to read my post. While first we have to realize that the powerholders want to keep this issue off the social and political agenda. And the public is unaware of the problem and directly or in dircetly supports the powerholders. I think first organizations need to be build to address this isssue, also linking up with current orgnization that have a simalar goals.A vision and strategy must be made like I somwhat layed out. And like I did in my project more people like you must document the problems and bring light to the powerholders’ roles. Becoming informed is the key to change. For some ideas on what you can do write your local politicans, start a facebook group, get more friends involeded. Slowly we can start a grassroots movement which over time can bring about real change to people who realy need it.

HW 44

Matt Personal And Political Blog said... Even, I really enjoyed your speech essay, you established the contrasted between the difference between midwives that just practice at houses, and midwives who practice in birthing centers in hospitals was very interesting and caught my attention. I thought the amount of background information that you put in to the piece to really further your point was outstanding. I think it's a really cruical topic and Im happy you put your two sense in. Matt Personal And Political Blog said... Steven, The statistics of home birth vs hospital births particularly were well thought out and analyzed. The information you had on the hormonal/mental advantages of home births I valued.I feel the contrast you brought up is worth digging deeper. Matt Personal And Political Blog said... I think the idea of investigating how the bond between mother and child many change due to a c-section or a vaginal birth was intreasting. Its a real worth whiled topic. Only thing I would of liked to hear is interveiws with people who expreciend both vaginal birth and c-section birth.I think this would of gave your paper even more flavour.Great Job.

HW 43 - Elevator speech

Ladies and Gentlemen, I'm only going to talk to you for a minute or so this morning,Ive come to speak to you about a grave a problem which rest in our hands.Since this country was founded, each generation of Americans has been called to the pulped to be judge .When we are called to give testimony to our generation what will we say, when asked did we care for the most vulnerable in our society? In pain's me to say that our answer will be , must be , no. Here lie's the very troubling problem. It is my believe that our generation like so many before us will be defined on the final success or failure of our war on poverty.

In the word's of John F. Kennedy "The world is very different now. For man holds in his mortal hands the power to abolish all forms of human poverty and all forms of human life." These words were echoed a century ago and yet we have done nothing. This is evident when it was estimated in 2007 37.5 million people were impoverished.36.2 million Americans are food insecure, including 12.4 million children; single women-headed households are worst off with 30.2%. Our own single mothers and children are living impoverished. This should come as no surprise when about 90% of the wealth in America is controlled by 10% of the upper class of the population.And when the United States spends one trillion dollars for every enemy soldier killed, and only seven billion dollars on the victims of poverty, this is all a very tragic mix up. This is some very sad news for all us .It's perhaps potent to ask knowing what we know now, what kind of a nation are we ? what direction do we wish to move into?

For those of you considering the evidence I just gave you , some might be filled with bitterness, or sadness or overwhelmed and doubtful that change can be made.Now it can be easy for us to move in that direction as a generation, sitting on our hands glued in fear ,that's what they aspect from us.But I say we expect different ,we can make an effort, to understand, and to comprehend, and replace that fear with the willpower to make a difference. What we need in the United States is not two Americas,not division; what we need in the United States is not greed or hatred; what we need in the United States is not poverty , but is real policy change for unwed mothers living in these most troubling conditions.

What we need is love, and wisdom, and compassion toward one another, and a feeling of justice toward those who still suffer within our country. So I ask you this morning to return home and find out how you can make a difference.How we can change the plight of single mother's in poverty. Yes to make this change we will have to face difficult times.Change does not come over night. It wont be the end of poverty as we know it. But if the vast majority of us decide to live up to this ideal, to think out of our own selfish needs, to care for those less fortunate in this country ,we can improve the quality of their life.

Let's dedicate ourselves ,our generation to this, let us be the change we so desperately need. Let us give birth to a new Nation.My friends let our generation not be judged on what it wondered was wrong and never changed but let it be judged by what it knew what was wrong and had the will to act. Let them never say we never did it.

HW 42 - Pregnancy & birth culminating project

I have spent most of my life in a blind discourse, I like so many other Americans have believed theirs is one America which falls and prospers together .But I have recently seen fit to follow another course. There are indeed two Americas, One America which sets foot everyday to spend most of their lives working ,while another sits and reaps the rewards .One America who's needs and interest are being long forgotten, while the other America's every wish is meant hand and foot at the heels . One America which is trying to make an honest dollar out of forty cents,while another America can buy anything it's heart desires.One America who believes the weird injustice's happening everyday in American is normal.

One America which has bought into the delusion of the "middle class",their a are are only two classes in America the lower class and the upper class. And in this lower class lie's a problem which the other America refuse's to make true change in, this problem is poverty. It was estimated in 2007 37.5 million people were impoverished.36.2 million Americans are food insecure, including 12.4 million children; single women-headed households are worst off with 30.2% . I believe that these issues confronting us cross all party lines.

One America wants you to believe that the issues stated are false part of some agenda to temper the maintenance of peace and prosperity. The line has been often used "We've never had it so good." But I have an uncomfortable feeling that this prosperity isn't something on which we can base our hopes for the future. No nation has survived very long under the burden of despair and poverty.And yes the poverty rate is growing,another 1.5 million people are expected to be added to the poverty rolls over 2007 figures - a total of nearly 39 million representing 12.7% of Americans.But the biggest group out of these figures that is being effected by this unknown crisis is America is unwed mother's.

Their seems to be a disproportionate number of families in poverty that are headed by single mothers.Their needs to be a spotlight on mothers in poverty, theirs must be attention drawn to this unsettling topic.Their plight can no longer be ignored. Work must be done toward policy changes that would benefit them and their children. Yes it must be noted that not all single mothers are in poverty. Tho most single mothers face their own special hardships of managing a family on their own, and a lot most are able to succeed. However, for mothers of low income, the hardships can be overwhelming and many find themselves trying to survive against formidable obstacles.

Their are many factors that contribute to the high rate of poverty among postpartum single mothers, including the unequal opportunities in education and employment, the overwhelming numbers of women who work in jobs that do not provide adequate wages and or benefits, the time many women devote to unpaid family care giving,the growing rate domestic violence, lack of access to affordable child care, insufficient child support and an inadequate network of public benefits. The lives of low-income single mothers has become a series of crises In America.A juggling act of sorts , with no true alternatives. From everything to where to find safe, decent and affordable housing without spending so much of the family income so that there’s not enough left for food, or utilities, or basic clothing. But the picture is not as bleak as it appears.Their are programs which exist that successfully launch single mothers into economic self-sufficiency. All of these programs share equal characteristics, the most prominent of which is that they take a comprehensive approach to addressing the needs of the poor.

Successful programs address the complete spec of the issues effecting single mothers, they combine intensive, respectful guidance with support for education, child care, health care, and housing. We have for to long in America be con into the idea of the "cowboy", that every American makes their own way , that we can left ourselves from our own bootstraps. But many families are unable to lift themselves out of poverty without government support. Public policy must encourage work, but no family with a full-time worker should have to live in poverty. Policy have to made that ease the stress of poverty and enable hard-working single mothers to reap larger benefits from working.This includes a living wage, pay equity, expanded family tax credits, paid sick leave and dependent care leave.Their must be flexible work schedules so that those that have jobs can balance work and family needs. Policymakers must at all levels , local, state and federal focus on this vulnerable population and work to ease their path to economic self-sufficiency before they fall into the cracks of the American dream .

Winston Churchill ones said that "the destiny of man is not measured by material computation. When great forces are on the move in the world, we learn we are spirits--not animals." And he said, "There is something going on in time and space, and beyond time and space, which, whether we like it or not, spells duty." Our duty as Americans ,a people who set themselves to higher morals, as people who believe they are still the moral beacon of world, and adhere to a much higher power is to help those around us who are less fortunate. You and I in the words of Ronald Reagan have a rendezvous with destiny.

Either we will preserve for generation's to come , the last so called "best hope of man on Earth", or we like so many other's before us will throw away our moral obligations and "take the last step into a thousand years of darkness." See why must it be the government and the American people's responsibility to care for the single mothers in poverty is because a single mother who is brought out of the shackles of poverty takes her children with her.That is what we all want, That is the American dream and that is how we peace and prosperity.